Not the Super Bowl Again!
This year I am trying to get pumped up for the big football game. I guess the Steelers and the Packers are involved.
You see, I hate football and I just can’t watch it on TV. I tried to watch a couple of Super Bowl games over the years, but I never seem to make it past the first quarter. I think I have watched maybe two football games in their entirety in the past 40 years.
I know there must be something wrong with me, and I am seeing a specialist about this. But she just doesn’t know what to prescribe as an antidote. So I have taken treatment into my own hands, before I go so far as to check myself into the Mayo Clinic to find out what is wrong with me.
My wife and I are ready. I cleaned the TV screen with Windex to make the image as inviting as possible. I vacuumed the carpet in the living room so I am not distracted by lint or dog hair on the floor as I sit there during kickoff. And I went to the grocery store yesterday and bought some great snacks. We are going to have shrimp cocktail, one of my favorites. I wonder if this is how most people make it through a game---they just buy lots of comfort foods and gorge themselves for three hours until the final gun.
But I am simply tired of being left out of conversations in public places. This next week, everyone will be talking about the fumbles, the TDs (I just Googled TD and found out that this is short for “touchdown”), the interceptions and the half-time show.Continued on the next page