TheFurFiles - Batman Vs. Superman, Too Much Of A Momma's Boy, Next Door Nookie
Madame Floretta “Fern” De Villiers, a.k.a. “Amanda Fox” is an author of erotic fiction and commentary. This is her weekly advice column.
Friday, March 11th, 2011.
Why do women play hard to get? Why can’t they just keep things simple, like hey, I like you and you like me - let’s get it on?
Let me tell you a story. Now pay close attention. There will be a quiz at the end.
Once upon a time, there was a little girl named Helga. The youngest child and only girl of ten children, she lived with her brothers and parents in a two-room house on the edge of a very high cliff. With the sea churning below and waves surging up to twenty feet, it was a dangerous place, but without much money, it was their only option for somewhere to call home.
Because they were so poor, the children were required to help tend the fields and watch over their sheep. Whenever they had a spare moment however, they would play, their merriment consisting mainly of the boys beating on Helga or wrestling her until she bled, as boys are want to do.
As one might expect, as soon as Helga was old enough to run, she did, her long legs and quick speed making it so that she was finally able to escape their clutches. But boys are not so easily defeated. In their eternal quest for domination, they still chased her, causing her to do the only thing she could in order to cope: she made a game of it. “You can’t catch me,” she’d tease, sticking out her tongue as she sped away. Angry at her cheekiness, the boys would then charge after her, this continuing on until their parents called them back to work or to go to bed.
One day, when she was about twelve – thinking that the game was getting rather boring – Helga decided to take it to the next level. Stopping near the edge of the cliff to feign tiredness, she panted, “Oh my. I have a terrible stitch.”
“Now’s my chance.” Robbie – the oldest and most obnoxious and hurtful of the brothers – ran as fast as he could toward his sister. When he was about two feet away, Helga sprung to one side and poor Robbie went flying over the escarpment.Continued on the next page