Gunman Holds Discovery Channel Hostage; Demands Every Week Be "Shark Week"
Earlier today, a gunman, identified by several sources as James Jay Lee, took the Discovery Channel Headquarters hostage. James Jay Lee has a previous history of run-ins with the law over the ideological leanings of this particular media outlet.
A list of Lee's demands can be found at savetheplanetprotest.com, though it is unclear as to whether or not these demands were made recently or in 2008 when Lee last encountered The Discover Channel.
Amongst the list of demands are the following:
- The Discovery Channel and it's affiliate channels MUST have daily television programs at prime time slots based on Daniel Quinn's "My Ishmael"
- All programs on Discovery Health-TLC must stop encouraging the birth of any more parasitic human infants
- Stop all shows glorifying human birthing on all your channels and on TLC
- You're also going to find solutions for unemployment and housing
Obviously the guy is clearly insane. Here's hoping everything turns out alright.
More news as events warrant.
UPDATE: CNN is reporting that Lee was taken into custody after being shot and his condition is listed as unkown. All three hostages were released safely.