Breathalyzer Boy Blows .158 While Driving
Did you have a fun Halloween? Was your costume remarkably original and the talk of the party? Or did you just buy this $30.95 breathalyzer costume?
Young James Miller of Cincinnati, Ohio went for Door No. 3. Among the kids, it was no doubt hilarious. Unfortunately after his partyin' he was unable to blow himself, therefore remaining unsure how drunk he was before he began driving around nearby Oxford, Ohio (home of Miami University) in the week hours of Sunday morning. He was spotted driving the wrong way down a one-way street. In all fairness, I've driven the wrong way down one-ways in strange towns at night. Of course, I was wearing people clothes and merely had too much Diet Pepsi to drink.
Upon being pulled over for this violation, he also had an open container, a birth age of under 21, and a BAC of .158 — higher than MU's football team win percentage.
As evidenced by the mugshot obtained by The Smoking Gun, the costume holds up about as well as a juicebox in a kiln.
If you can't read the costume, TSG notes that the front of it "includes three sobriety levels: Boring, Life of the Party, and Sotally Tober." Miller can customize his costume next year to include "owner of Ohio party plates." I'm sure the young offender would agree: that blows.