Logic Is No Match for Metamorphosis (DVD)
In the indie horror flick Metamorphosis, Christopher Lambert (as a nasty, witty vampire) seems to summon up the spirit of Colonel Hans Landa (Inglourious Basterds) for inspiration. If only director Jeno Hodi had Quentin Tarantino for his muse…
Metamorphosis tells the tale of some kooky kids researching the legend of Elizabeth Bathory (the Blood Countess) in the Carpathian Mountains. Now, Lizzie was a real cut-up, and a serious film based on her story would be interesting, but Metamorphosis is not a serious film. It’s actually a film with multiple personality disorder. Part of it is the story of some likable kids who end up in the evil Countess’ castle, another part is a tale of a vampire with a somewhat warped, campy sense of humor, and yet another part strives to be a serious horror film.
The best description of Metamorphosis is, the sum of its parts is not as good as some of its parts. The opening is an atmospheric, historical vignette which—one hopes—will set the tone for the entire production. It doesn’t. Instead we switch to modern times, a nutty funeral, and three young adults on a road trip through Hungary, looking for legends in all the wrong places.
There’s vampirism, curses, the supernatural, goulash, wolves, and monks; in the end the time-space continuum is stretched so far out of shape it must be renamed the time-space catastrophe. The first part of the film makes sense in a campy, vampirey sort of way, but the last twenty minutes leaves the audience sputtering, “but…wait…hey…what the…” As they say in New Jersey “Fuhgeddaboudit.”
None of this matters. If you’re in the mood for vampires (who are not moony teenagers) defying the vampire-movie code (they go out in the daylight and don’t fear crosses or Bibles), then spend 115 minutes with Metamorphosis. There’s lots of action, hardly any blood, and a love story to boot! Enjoy Christopher Lambert’s performance—while wishing he was Christoph Waltz—and consider the rest of it the price you pay for a couple of laughs. Pop some corn, eat some, throw some, and when it’s all over, do what they do in New Jersey.
Bottom Line: Would I buy/rent/stream Metamorphosis? Definitely not buy, but I found it entertaining on some schizophrenically supernatural level.